Archive for February, 2008

Homemade Weed Killer

Friday, February 29th, 2008

By Bryan Super Everyone wants to kill all of the weeds in their yard and have a nice clean field of green. There are so many weed killer products available that you can really never know which ones work. What you may not know is that there are some ways to make a homemade weed killer. If you are cautious of the environment and don’t want to end up killing your grass and your weeds you should look into an alternative to regular toxic weed killers. With all of the toxins in the environment some people don’t want to further pollute the air we all breathe. I love natural solutions to everyday problems. Here is a great homemade weed killer. 1 tablespoon of gin or vivegar 1 teaspoon of dish soap 1 gallon of hot water What you can then do is put this into an old spray bottle or pour it over the weeds. I prefer to spray it on the weeds. When you are spraying your new homemade weed killer be careful no to spray the grass. The vinegar will kill the weeds but it could also kill some grass. You should spray the weed killer during a sunny and hot day. After the weeds bake in the sun for a couple of days the weeds will be dead. If you are worried about your grass then you should be very careful when spraying the solution. Basically the vinegar kills the weeds and the soap makes the vinegar stick to the leaves of the weeds. Always remember to protect yourself as well. You will probably want to wear your gardening gloves so your hands don’t get covered in vinegar and you end up with stinky hands. The great thing about using this solution is that it is natural. Natural solutions are essential for a cleaner environment. Although this may seem impossible, every effort helps. The homemade weed killer will also provide natural chemicals that will help keep the rest of your yard nice and green. For more information visit how to make a Homemade Weed Killer. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Bryan_Super http://EzineArticles.com/?Homemade-Weed-Killer&id=264965 ambien cr neuropathy ambien by mail ambien amnesia ambien prescription online

Individual Growth Is Spiritual As Well - Not Just Bones And Muscles

Friday, February 29th, 2008

By Gregg Hall We all grow naturally. Without much effort, we see bones develop from infant stages into adult hood, from soft pliable material to hard matter. We see muscles grow and we feel ourselves getting stronger with time. All of this occurs naturally, as we eat, work, and play. But what does it take for us to grow spiritually? Spiritual growth requires a conscious effort of introspection and analysis. If we want to grow spiritually, we need to be by turning our thoughts in instead of out. Instead of focusing on what is around us, we need to examine our hearts. Why do we do what we do? Why do we hang out with the people that we hang out with? What are our good traits and how did we attain them? What are our bad traits, and how can we get rid of them? Introspection teaches us to consider how we act and it motivates us to change how we behave on a daily and moment by moment basis. But introspection requires great courage. Many people never look inward because they fear that they won’t like what they see, and ultimately they don’t want to change what they see. When you grow spiritually, you take hold of the potentials you’ve been given. You consider what you can do, and you grow even more by reaching beyond what you think you can do and thus developing more potential. Science and religion have been at odds for decades now when examining the human spirit. For example, religion sees human beings as just spiritual beings that move on this planet momentarily, and science sees the spirit as just a part of the whole individual. People grow spiritually when the recognize what they must do enhance growth: their beliefs, morality, experience, and good works form the foundation for spiritual growth. Ironically, the psychologist James Maslow theorized that if a person can meet his physical needs, he can meet his spiritual needs as well. Ultimately, when we seek to grow spiritually, we seek meaning in our lives. And that’s where faith comes in. Religions such as Christianity, Judaism, and Islam teach that their followers will find meaning through serving a higher being, a Creator. And psychologists theorize that we find meaning through ourselves, that we determine if we have meaning in our lives. But ultimately, finding meaning means realizing that we live on this earth for a purpose, and once we realize that, we put all of our desires and actions into focus with that purpose: we live for that purpose. Finally, growing spiritually means understanding our connection with the world around us. Doing so will lead to a greater respect of the things and people around us. And whether we find that connection through faith or psychology, ultimately we grow spiritually because of that connection. Gregg Hall is an author living in Navarre Florida. Find more about this as well as spiritual christian gifts at www.spiritualchristiangifts.com Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Gregg_Hall http://EzineArticles.com/?Individual-Growth-Is-Spiritual-As-Well—Not-Just-Bones-And-Muscles&id=324840 gifts ambien viagra no prescriptions online lorazepam get prescription for ambien online free ambien cr

Wedding Shower Favors

Thursday, February 28th, 2008

By Kevin Stith Wedding shower favors are a way to extend gratitude from the bride-to-be and her maid of honor, to the guests of the wedding shower, for providing wedding gifts to the bride before the wedding day. Wedding shower favors can be elegant trinkets or small humorous gifts. Since women are primarily the guests at wedding showers, pampering bath sets are frequently selected as the thank you gift. The tradition of wedding showers began centuries ago in the Netherlands. The story tells of a Dutch girl who desired to be married, but she had no dowry that would enable her to be wed. Her family was poor and nothing had been put aside for her dowry. At that time, the European cultures perceived that women were of a lesser value than men, so it was a requirement for a girl’s family to provide money or other material things to equalize the support a husband would provide for his new wife. Frequently men would refuse to marry a girl if she failed to provide a dowry. The girl’s friends seeing her distress, pitched in and showered her with the many items needed to establish a household. Preserved foods, quilts, linens, cooking utensils and furniture were contributed so that her dowry was in order. Although society no longer requires dowry’s from women, it’s still quite expensive to establish a new household, especially if the bride and groom haven’t been living on their own. The tradition continues through all cultures and for brides of all financial means. Wedding shower gifts continue to be primarily household items and linens. Brides also frequently receive beautiful lingerie intended to spice up many an evening with her new husband. Wedding shower favors provide a means to say thank you to the guest for the gift given and for participating in the bride’s happiness. Like the favors given at the reception, the options for expressing gratitude remain endless. Tokens can be utilitarian or strictly whimsical. Wedding shower favors can reflect the theme of the gathering or be tailored to the individual guests. Wedding showers are typically celebrations with a smaller number of guests, so it can be affordable to provide more elaborate gifts like tea for one sets or spa gift certificates. Wedding shower favors can be common items that have been personalized or uniquely designed. Tokens of appreciation don’t have to be expensive, while the most cost effective gifts can also be the most creative. Wedding Favors Info provides personalized, homemade, cheap, and unique wedding favors, including chocolate and cookie favors, wedding favor boxes, wedding shower favors, and more. Wedding Favors Info is the sister site of Wedding Invitations Web. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Kevin_Stith http://EzineArticles.com/?Wedding-Shower-Favors&id=64153 buy ambien online 100 tabs can you give ativan with zyprexa buy ambien online without a prescription buy ambien cod

12-Month Calendar

Wednesday, February 27th, 2008

By Julia Jones Maintain a 12- month calendar for a happy and fruitful life. Your calendar should contain pictures that are filled with sweet memories of the past. Make your calendar attractive and colorful with all import events in your life. It is an innovative way of life to show that your relationship is important to you. It is a way to have a healthy relationship. As the month pass by stick the pictures of time spent together. This is what will be done at the end of the month but before that you need to jot out activities that you intend to do together and individually date wise. You should always maintain such calendars as they help you take out time for each other. You can sit with your partner and look into his appointments and work schedule. The free time you can keep to be together and to spend quality time together. But maintaining a calendar needs a lot of care as there is a possibility that your work and timings are such that you do not have time for each other the whole month. In that case you can try to find out more time to spend together in the coming month to compensate for the previous month. Make sure that your calendar has a date and time where you both can be together. The month you do not get enough time to spend together you stick pictures of your wedding or any such photograph that reminds you of special time spent together. Create a 12 month calendar to plan out your work in a systematic way. Maintaining a calendar not only helps you to be organized but also helps you cope up unexpected situations. If you create a calendar and go according to it you find time for yourself and are never at a chaos when some emergency such as an accident or health problems comes up. Whatever the emergency if you are organized you can handle situations better and escape that torture of a perplexed and confused situation and emotions. Your calendar should also include your children and friend. You have to give extra time to your children as they require you the most. They are the ones who are dependent on you both and thus need a lot of care and attention. Stick cute photographs of your children on your calendar to help you smile in the most difficult situations. Your friend too require some time of yours. They are the ones who standby you when your family needs help and support. So could include them too in your calendar. Your life should be a blend of all- work, responsibilities, hobbies, interests, socializing, parties, fun and entertainment. Your yearly calendar should contain all. A calendar cannot be complete without all these factors of your life. One should remember that you do not have to be very rigid about the date and time set on the calendar. At times you have to go against your set calendar. It is only to help you out make your routine work easier. In conclusion at the end of the year you can present the calendar to your loved one as a remembrance of the bygone year and as sweet memories to always cherish. Find more information visit: 12-Month Calendar We at Keepcondom.com are providing you the choices you can make, to select your condom brands according to your needs. Keepcondom.com Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Julia_Jones http://EzineArticles.com/?12-Month-Calendar&id=457657 ambien shortness of breath ambien woith out prescrpition overdose of ativan online pharmacy free consultations cheapest ambien

How To Eat Out And Lose Weight

Tuesday, February 26th, 2008

By Melanie Mendelson Restaurants have a reputation for making people gain weight due to the huge portions and unhealthy foods. However, you don’t have to give up eating out if you are trying to lose weight. You can still eat out and lose weight if you follow these strategies: Get Zero Calorie Drinks The easiest way to cut down on calories is to avoid soft drinks. A large coke has as many calories as a burger! Don’t get sugar-loaded drinks. Instead, drink water or unsweetened ice tea. Freshly brewed ice tea is very popular in restaurants because it tastes good and doesn’t make you gain weight. Go Easy On Bread A slice of bread with butter has around 130 calories. When faced with a large bread basket, it’s easy to munch away three or more pieces! If you do that, the bread will cost you as many calories as the main dish. Be wise and limit yourself to one piece. Don’t Arrive Too Hungry You can’t be rational when you are starving. If you are way too hungry by the time you get to a restaurant, you’ll just eat everything in sight. Grab a small snack before you head to a restaurant, so it curbs off your hunger and you can think clearly when making your food choices. Make Healthier Food Choices Opt for chicken or fish instead of red meat, and baked potato or rice instead of fries. Choose foods that are steamed, grilled, broiled or baked instead of fried. Avoid dishes that are labeled as “breaded”, “crispy” or “battered” those are the code words for “fried”. Ask For Dressing And Sauce On The Side Even a green salad can pack as many calories as a burger if it’s swimming in a fatty dressing. To overcome this problem, ask for any dressings or sauces on the side. Then put a little bit of dressing or sauce on your food. This way you can still enjoy it and control how much you consume. Pack Away The Extra Food Don’t wait till the end of the meal to ask for a doggy bag. Instead, ask the waiter to bring you a box in the beginning. Decide how much you are going to eat, and put the rest of the food in a box right away. This way this extra food won’t sit on your plate and tempt you. Plus you’ll have a great lunch the next day! Share A Meal If the restaurant is known for especially large portion sizes, you can share a portion with a friend. One person can order a small appetizer, and another person an entree. Ask the waiter to bring all the food at the same time and also some extra plates. You’ll end up eating much less and save a lot of money as a bonus! Melanie Mendelson publishes weight loss tips and success stories in her free newsletter sign up at http://www.WeightLossBlueprint.com Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Melanie_Mendelson http://EzineArticles.com/?How-To-Eat-Out-And-Lose-Weight&id=447181 ambien ambien prescription online ambien 2bpill ambien dreams ataxia 2b zolpidem

Pope in Turkey

Monday, February 25th, 2008

By Paul Davis Pope Benedict is visiting Turkey this week to speak to the largely Muslim nation and its leaders. He will be endeavoring to build bridges, reconcile, provide international recognition to Turkey as they endeavor to enter the European Union, and address key issues in the religious world. Some of the major issues facing the religious world are the war on terror and reciprocity. Terrorism incited by religion and religious followers interpretations of their “holy” books has disrupted global peace for centuries. In the last decade turmoil has become increasingly intense throughout the world, with no nation being safe any longer. All nations are now caught up safeguarding their people and homeland from religious extremists who zealously kill in the name of God. Jesus said 2,000 years ago, “The day will come that people will kill in the name of God, thinking they are doing Him a service. This they do because they do not know God” (John 16:1-3). Make no mistake about it. Those who profess to know and serve God by killing people with beliefs that differ from their own are not of God. On the contrary, killers are of their father the devil who came to “kill, steal, and destroy” (John 10:10) It is no surprise that these religious terrorists who kill in the name of God pervert and twist religion, which often falsely represents God anyhow, to serve their imperialistic agenda. The devil is very cunning and “religious.” Satan twisted Scripture from the beginning and even quoted it to Jesus (Matthew 4; Luke 4). For this reason Jesus referred to Satan as “the father of lies” (John 8:44). Religion therefore is very alluring and deceiving as it often misrepresents God and distorts His true heart and nature. As for reciprocity, one of the key issues the Pope will be addressing in Turkey, there needs to be much more freedom of religious expression in the world. Pope John Paul, Pope Benedict’s predecessor, permitted the Muslims to build a mosque in Rome which was largely funded by Saudi Arabia. To this day however Saudi Arabia forbids any churches to be constructed or Bibles to be brought into their country. By no means is there religious freedom throughout the Muslim world. Muslim militants bomb and burn down churches in Pakistan and Indonesia, sometimes even on Christmas day. Filipino contract workers and other Christians from abroad working in Saudi Arabia are often arrested and imprisoned for indefinite time periods for expressing their faith in small private worship ceremonies within homes in Saudi Arabia. It seems Islam is quite aware of the necessity for their religion to be spread by the sword and through force historically. Apparently they have reason to believe without compulsion and fear of repercussions their people would not willingly adhere to Muslim beliefs and religious practices. Hence Islamic nations are most intolerant and permissive of religious violence when taken against the minority religious groups by Muslim militants. The conclusion therefore can be made that because Islam is intolerant and violent, spiritually the religion must be quite impotent. Religious freedom will verify the above assessment if those who call themselves God loving and God fearing would be so bold to stop fighting for God and let people decide for themselves who they want to worship and serve. Religious fanatics ironically are the biggest cowards of them all because they do not allow human beings created in God’s image to freely seek, discover, and worship their Creator. Instead they try to play God and impose their religious interpretations and views on others, legalize religion at the national level, and then legally forbid anyone of another faith to freely worship as he or she chooses. Undoubtedly the majority of such violence and intolerance throughout the world is coming from the Islamic faith and nations. It is very appropriate and timely that the Pope is in Turkey to confront the Islamic world about their countless human rights violations, intolerance of other faiths, inhumane treatment of of religious followers in their lands, and their fear of Christians and Jews. Paul Davis is a life coach (relational & professional), popular worldwide keynote speaker, creative consultant, explorer, mediator, minister, liberator and dream-maker. Paul is a minister and author of several books including God vs. Religion; Breakthrough for a Broken Heart; Stop Lusting & Start Living; and Adultery: 101 Reasons Not to Cheat. Paul’s compassion for people & passion to travel has taken him to over 50 countries of the world where he has had a tremendous impact. Paul has also brought revival to many in war-torn, impoverished and tsunami stricken regions of the earth. His nonprofit organization Dream-Maker Ministries is building dreams and breaking limitations. Paul’s Breakthrough Seminars inspire, revive, awaken, impregnate with purpose, impart the fire of desire, catapult people into a new level of self-awareness, facilitate destiny discovery and dream fulfillment. Contact Paul to minister, speak at your event or for life coaching: RevivingNations@yahoo.com 407-967-7553. For additional info: http://www.DreamMakerMinistries.com, http://www.CreativeCommunications.TV Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Paul_Davis http://EzineArticles.com/?Pope-in-Turkey&id=371989 ambien sleeping melatonin vs ambien less expensive purchase ambien cr mylan zolpidem tartrate

Low Voltage Outdoor Lighting

Sunday, February 24th, 2008

By Marcus Peterson Once the design and type of outdoor lighting fixture is selected, the next important question is voltage. Outdoor light fixtures are available in either 12-volt or 120-volt versions and for houses the best deal is low voltage outdoor lighting. These are easier to install as the system runs on harmless 12-volt current with light weight wiring laid on the ground or buried just below surface. The 120-volt system on other hand is same as used in interior of house and requires precautions and handling. The advantage of high voltage outdoor lighting is that it is permanent using buried conduit whereas the low voltage outdoor lighting is that is easily damaged due to superficial placement of wires. With expenses climbing the graph we need economical trimmings. A saving advantage of low-voltage outdoor lighting is that one does not need a professional for installation. The money saved can be spent on high-quality fixtures and landscaping. Some low voltage light fixtures work on solar energy and once charged work when sensors activate the lights on sunset. Another advantage of low voltage outdoor lighting is that smaller and compact fixtures are flexible and can be activated by timers, motion detection or switches. This is an advantage as compared with high or regular voltage lighting fixtures that require conduits and labor to fix wiring. The size and design of low voltage outdoor lighting fixtures help add to the aesthetics of surrounding. The reason they can be safely hidden or placed in nooks and corners, waterfalls, bushes or exterior of buildings and residences. The drawback is that to highlight a particular area more fixtures are needed. Quality also matters in that if inexpensive crack and corrode due to extreme temperature or corrosion. The inconvenience ends here as low voltage outdoor lighting once installed requires minimum attention. Nevertheless a perfectionist or cleanliness freak would like to coat sockets with silicon - based lubricants once a year, clean accumulating debris in up-lifting fixtures and replace dead lamps to avoid unused voltage. Low voltage outdoor lighting is aesthetically safe, economical and energy efficient with performance comparable to a 120 volt system. Outdoor Lighting provides detailed information about outdoor lighting, decorative outdoor lighting, low voltage outdoor lighting and more. Outdoor Lighting is affiliated with Gazebos. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Marcus_Peterson http://EzineArticles.com/?Low-Voltage-Outdoor-Lighting&id=130460 ambien side ambien chemical name b ambien bitter taste ambien

Love is a Decision

Wednesday, February 20th, 2008

By Gayle Santana NOTE: If you are in a relationship where you are suffering abuse or endangerment of yourself and your family of any kind, this article is not for you. Get help, now! My husband and I have survived being married for 32 years. It was not 32 perfect years by any stretch of the imagination. We are as opposite as two people could be. We married young and added 5 children to the mix. Here are some of the decisions we made along the way that have helped us to stay together. -TAKE AN ASSESSMENT OF WHAT IS GOOD. A few times in our marriage, divorce crossed my mind. If you are married long enough, it will! But I took an assessment of the man I have in front of me. When I weighed the pros and cons I realized that what I had wasnt half bad. You have to know that every relationship has its cross to bear. A good friend of mine who I consider a serial divorcee once said, If I had known then what I know now, I would have stayed with my first husband. You see, you will have those times where you question why you should stay in this marriage but do keep in mind that everyone, no matter how perfect their relationship looks from the outside, has experienced some great degree of difficulty and thats putting it quite mildly. -ALL THINGS WILL NOT BE EQUAL. If you expect things to be equal in a relationship, youd better think again. You have to think in terms of giving. Am I doing my part? Is there anything I can do to make things better? And when you dont have much to give, ideally, your mate will fill in but keeping a scorecard wont make for a good relationship. -USE THE LANGUAGE OF LOVE AND RESPECT. Ive heard people speak of their mate in such derogatory terms that its no wonder things arent working. Check your conversation with and about your mate. Speak positively. You may begin to see your mate in a totally different light. -TAKE ACTION. Date Night, love talk/notes/calls. New relationships work because of the effort expended. When I first suggested date night on a weekly basis my husband protested. Now he looks forward to it as much as I do. So even if its a one-sided effort, dont worry, action is infectious. Eventually your mate will be inspired to contribute. -LOOKING/SMELLING GOOD Trust me what you see as your flaws, most of the time, do not really matter to your mate. Be flirtatious, be sexy. They make sexy clothes, underwear and lingerie in EVERY size. And smile! It makes wrinkles null and void! -GOING ABOVE AND BEYOND TO LET YOUR MATE KNOW YOU CARE. I do 99% of the cooking in our home. But I really dont mind because my husband is always appreciative, complimenting me on everything he enjoys and always thanking me for doing it. I let him know that I appreciate the things he does too. He fixes and builds and I never have to touch the yard. But every couple brings different interests and skills to the marriage. My sister and eldest daughter are the ones with a toolbox. My youngest son is a chef so hes the chief cook in his relationship. You have to appreciate what is in your world and dont compare it to so-called norms. -FORGIVENESS The ability to let go and move on is key. You must judge your relationship by your own rules. Even if those rules dont match the societal norms. Hillary Clintons husband publicly humiliated her in the eyes of many. Hillary made her own decisions as to what do about it and divorce was not her answer. Dr. Wayne Dyer says Be independent of the good opinion of others. This is particularly true in marriage. Tonight, as I write this, my husband cooked dinner, a rare but delicious occasion. Included were home-made lemonade, a hot towel to wipe my hands afterward and an order to sit down and do nothing because I deserve it. I could write a book about all the gory details that went on between the wedding and this loving relationship you see before you, but you should know its kind of like childbirth. You experience all of this horrific pain and after you see that sweet little baby, you forget all about what you went through. Make a decision to love the one you are with today. I did and I dont regret a moment of it. Gayle Santana has been married for 32 years. She a mom, grandmother, successful entrepreneur and an aspiring writer. Please email her at gayle@pvsnetwork.com. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Gayle_Santana http://EzineArticles.com/?Love-is-a-Decision&id=186501 mexican pharmacy phentermine phentermine without doctor prescription phentermine online physicians and pharmacy non prescription phentermine

The Secrets Of Writing Successful Ads

Sunday, February 17th, 2008

By Dr Robby Bilton Placing an Ad can be an exciting experience. However, too few people give a lot of thought to what they should be saying in their ad. Instead they work up their nerve and let the excitement carry them away and rather than placing an Ad that is well thought out and designed to attract the people they wish to meet, it may have the opposit e effect. They may feel let down by the number of responses they receive or they may receive replies from people who do not suit them. This can be very discouraging. Here are a few tips to get you going to writing successful Ads that works! There are a number of things to consider when you decide to place a Companions Wanted Ad - the Cost, the number of people who will see your ad, the length of your ad, the kind of people you are trying to attract, the actual content of the Ad, ways to protect your privacy, the kinds of results you can realistically expect from your Ad. The Cost The cost of your ad can vary dramatically depending on where you live. If you live in a large city with a number of publications, the costs can vary quite a bit from paper to paper. If you live in a rural area or a small town with a limited number of pubilcations, the cost could be quite different. Most publications usually base the cost of their advertising on their readership. You can reasonably expect that a publication with only a few hundred or thousand readers will have a much lower cost for advertising. Whereas, a publication with a high readership will have a larger cost for advertising. As with most things, it is best if you shop around when you are considering placing an ad. Phone or write various publications in your area and enquire about the cost of placing an ad. Also ask about their number of readers so you can make an informed choice. What may sound like a bargain may in fact not be, if your ad is reaching only a couple of hundred readers. Remember, the more people who see your ad increases the number of responses you are likely to get! The more responses you get, the more likely you are to meet that special someone you hve been looking for. If you think of the cost of your ad in terems of the number of responses you get, you can easily see why spending a little more initially may work to your advantage. Consider the following example: You place a medium sized ad in a publication with only a few hundred readers. Your ad cost you $20. You think you have done well but you only get 2 responses. Each response has cost you $10 OR You place your medium sized ad in a publication that has a few thousand readers. Your ad cost you %60. You get 20 responses. Now each response has cost you only $3. You have increased your chances of meeting that special someone at a minimal cost! The number of People Who Will See Your Ad As discussed previously, you want the maximum number of people to see your ad. If you want to meet that special person, you have to play the numbers game. The more peopele who see your ad will increase the number of responses you receive and the more likely you are to meet that special person for you. If you live in a large city you may have to choose between a large number of publications. You would probably get the best results by placing your ad in the publication with the highest readership (usually one of your daily newspapers) even though the cost may be higher. If cost is not a problem for you, place your ads in more that one publication. You may want to consider placing an ad in your daily newspaper and another ad in a smaller publication that has a selected readership. You could choose to place your second ad in apublication that has a selected readership. You could choose to place your ad in a publication that caters to your particular part of the city increasing your chances of meeting someone who lives near you. Or you could place your second ad in a publication that caters to particular group of people, as long as those readers are the type of people you would want to meet. If you live in a small town or in a rural area, you may want to place an ad in the local publication. But remember these publi ations may have a much lower redership than a large city newspaper. Unless you only want to meet people who live in the same area as you do, you would probably be wise to also place an ad in the publication with the largest readership in the nearest large city to you. If cost is a strong consideration and you can only afford to place one ad, then you are probably better off placing your ad in the large city’s publication. Most large city publications send copies out of town to surrounding areas and so you will reach people in the city as well as people in rural areas anyway. 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Welcome To Girl World: Cliques, Bitches And The Secret Politics Of Survival For Any Teenage Girl

Saturday, February 16th, 2008

By Mikaela Ferguson Teenage Girls. A Seemingly rich subject matter on it’s own. Parents don’t understand them, they can never understand each other and god help them if they at some point need to understand themselves. But since the release of the movie Mean Girls, the underlying evil that is embedded in every female brain has been exposed and explored so much so that i found myself inspired to discover just how common these situations of utter chaos and anarchy within ‘Girl World’ really are. The film gave us all a one way ticket to this world of cattiness cliques and ‘can-you-believe-she-said..’, this place was like a secret society, a taboo subject, girls were kind and gentle and played nice. WRONG. Hell, i was unaware of the ways of Girl World and it was my natural habitat for 18 years. Surely this was a disservice to my adolescent self, and now, being all the wiser, i feel that i was lucky to have come out alive at all since i was living without this information at my disposal, but who am i to deny anyone else of it. Unless you are or have been a teenage girl, ‘Girl World’ is going to scare the pants off you.Trying to decipher the intricate workings of the mind of a young woman trying to claw her way to the top of the social ladder, or better yet a girl who is desperately trying not to get trampled on during the struggle is definately a worrying concept. Of course, there’s much more to it than popularity and social status, but lets not get carried away just yet. Explaining the politics (yes it’s a political system girls work within, scary no?) of Girl World to an ‘outsider can make you appear petty and superficial. Some cases are, of course, more extreme than others and the behavior will vary but even so , this has become the common stamping ground for the average teenage girl with it’s multiple degrees of underlying rules, concerns, conflicts, feelings and beliefs connected with the population of Girl World. It is my mission to share with you the secrets of this place… if you dare. Kids are cruel, its been said thousands of times, but its true, and it doesnt end with calling names, pulling hair or a whack in the face, in fact i’m sure anyone who has been exposed to the cruelty of girl politics would agree with me when i say that, a physical attack would almost be a breath of fresh air when you’re living in Girl World. See, the worst damage done to most teenage girls today is much more brutal- the attack that no one sees but you. Subtle bullying; the kind that plays tricks with ones mind. The kind of bullying that makes you question, not only yourself, but also whether it is even happening at all. Its happened to every girl in high school at some point and my aim is to shine a light on this phenomenon and the seriousness of the situation, most people dont see the bad side of the good girls. Something that many people dont realise is that the characteristics found in the Clique, can be found in every group of girls, any group, any size, anywhere - are all guilty of some of the things that cause concern in Girl World. Inside A Girl’s Mind It is a scary concept stepping inside the mind of a Girl.A world full of paranoia, vulnerability, conformity, pressure, manipulation and this is just her friends! To fully understand and appreciate how a girl thinks you have to understand the world in which she lives. Here is Girl World in a Nutshell: * Girl World is run like any society. There is a role for everyone, high status or low, it is survival of the fittest, or bitchiest in some cases. * The leaders are more like dictators, they are ruthless, and the environment where the mindset begins and breeds is one of madness. * Everywhere you turn is a threat; you have to keep your enemies close to keep them on a short tether in case they start to creep up the social ladder before you. * There are specific standards you must live up to, laws to abide and once you become consumed by Girl World, you make the biggest sacrifice of all yourself. If this sounds intense to you, you’d be right. In Girl World there are so many rules to follow, but the strange thing is that no one actually knows what those rules are, until someone breaks them, and then suddenly everyone becomes quite absolute about what is or is not acceptable. Most of all, everyone, especially girls, wants to fit in, to belong, to be included. Studies have shown that girls in particular, depend mostly on the relationships with their peers during adolescence more than they depend on the relationships with their parents or siblings. Girls are twice as likely to consider suicide if they have few friends or feel isolated.Girls generally need one on one interaction with their peers in order to feel secure within a group. Boys on the other hand tend to cope better in larger groups. If a girl hasnt got a girlfriend she can talk to this can have a major impact on how she functions and how she feels inside. This is why the politics of Girl World are both ridiculously important for the girls as well as well as a extreme worry for their parents, teachers, and the community. The scary thing is that they are in fact, their own worst enemies. Another interesting study I found said that girls were at a greater risk of suicide if the people they named as their friends, dont name each other as friends. The dynamics of the group and their friends becomes more of an issue than most people would think. Its hard to comprehend how a group of teenage girls can drive another to considering such serious things as self-harm and suicide. Its definitely a problem and the scary thing is that its so hard to see from the outside, scarier still; sometimes its hard to see even from the inside. In Girl World , every girl is a perpetrator - subtle aggression is the key to hurting someone. Rolling eyes, turning away, ignoring someone, sarcasm, barring just some of the delights of being a girl. The worst and scariest thing about it is that they can do these things without other people, including parents and teachers knowing that it is going on. A girl that is being isolated, bullied or teased by her clique believes that these girls are her friends, and that SHE mustve done something terrible to be treated this way. I know this sounds crazy, but also keep in mind that, when you live in girl world its a very brave girl that would simply get up and leave the group of friends she has. It seems impossible, and not worth the risk. It’s not uncommon to hear a girl say something along the lines of : its better to be in a group that you hate, than sitting by yourself in the playground., so this is how they live. High School is scary enough without the rules, expectations and paranoia that go along with fitting in with a group of friends. Girls are so insecure at this point in their lives and are so confused about who they are that they will try to be anything that could possibly feel right at the time. Everyone knows what its like walking past the masses of other kids to get to class each time the bell rings at school, but can you imagine what its like to be constantly aware and worried about what each and every person you pass thinks of you? It is this crippling fear of judgement that drives girls to somewhat ‘destroy’ their peers. The classic idea that making someone else look bad, will ultimately make you look good. Unless you have been a part of the subtle bullying then you couldn’t begin to imagine what its like. You might ask how or why would someone continue to associate with these girls if they are bullying you? why not walk away? Simple in theory. But nothing is so simple in Girl World. “Queen Bees & Wannabes” Author Rosalind Wiseman defines girl world in a brilliant metaphor that i have taken on as genius, it goes something like this; Imagine High School is a Cruise Ship. There are planned activities regularly, everyone is fairly familiar and if anyone gets hurt there is someone there to help them to their feet again. Theres a girl on the ship, and suddenly she sees all the other girls saying that the ship is stupid, and its time to get off, like lemmings throwing themselves off a cliff. She leaves the safe secure ship and climbs aboard a life raft with the first girls she sees. The girls drift off on this life raft, and then she starts to ask herself, how did I get here? Why did I get off the ship? The waves are too big! There are limited supplies! Now the ship is impossibly far away and shes trapped with these girls, shell have to bond with them in order to survive, shes not stupid, but she either stays on the raft with these girls she doesnt necessarily like, or be thrown into the ocean. So she stays and hopes that things will get better, until she is hopefully rescued. It sounds dramatic, but the life raft that is the Clique, can sometimes feel like a matter of life or death to girls. Of course I cant use Rosalind’s metaphor without mentioning that there are some girls that arent afraid to take a swim, rather than stay in the life raft. These girls are often stronger because of the struggle, sometimes they swim back to the ship, or they might find another raft, it all has to do with the various roles and personalities within Girl World. Within Girl World, there are multiple types of girls, and we have to give credit for the sophistication of their social structure. Positions in girl world arent always filled, nor are the girls in each position always as extreme as i describe. Also, a girls status can change with the falling from grace of another, but as I go on I am sure that you will find a description of girls that you know or have known before, proving that these stereotypes are strangely common no matter what part of Girl World they reside.In life we hear about stereotypes under which people in society fall. While I tend not to agree with stereotypes i will be ,In part two of this article, using a few, to facilitate a description of the types of girls that populate Girl World, beginning with the powerful and on to the targets. Here’s hoping that part one of this article has drawn some kind of stimulus for thought among anyone out there be it a parent , sibling , teacher or a local Girl World resident. To close this first installment i will say that it is definately worthwhile spending some time inside the mind of a teenager, however scary a place it might be. In the long run, the inner workings of a teenagers mind will determine the ideas and thoughts that shape the adults they become. Unless we can assist in controlling the ways in which these girls can influence each other through this destructive and lets face it , concerning behavior, who knows how many adolescences will be lost to the pain of submitting to the ways Girl World. 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